I love my former teacher buddies. They often send me email that only those involved in education can truly appreciate. One teaches and teaches and reviews, then on test day, it’s not only the students who are apprehensive. The teachers get a grade every time they give tests as well. We find out how successful we are at really getting the material across to the students.
The following is an example of tests on days when we do not do as well as we hoped. The email came entitled “Why Teachers Drink!” I can’t think of a better title than that. Enjoy…and then pity the teachers. In this day and age of student accountability, the teachers are on the line too.
Revealed: The student howlers that show our dumbed down exams are still too much for some pupils
No matter how far our exams are dumbed down, it seems it’s not far enough for today’s pupils.
But rather than admit defeat in the face of tricky questions, some decide to take a more creative approach to their answers.
After scouring exam papers and speaking to teachers, humorist Richard Benson has collected the worst student howlers in a new book.
You won’t know whether to laugh – or cry.
Taken from F In Exams: The Best Test Paper Blunders by Richard Benson (Summersdale Publishers, £5.99)
Atticannie's Blog 
i love this website :L
Absolutely lovely. It points to a clear answer to today’s education “problem”: No, children are not less intelligent than they once were. Thanks for the post.
Brilliant, i guess this is what happens when a child doesn’t know the answer and feels like being witty instead. I know a teacher (no names) who, whilst doing their degree, drew a picture of a man crying saying ‘i’ve totally failed this’ and amazingly got a B for the paper. Even he admits there’s no way in hell he actually earned that B, so maybe amusing the examiner can do little favours here and there…
(not that i endorse doing so!)
thats awesome!!!!! i will use some of those
They are authentic…I did stuff like that all the time….simply because I didn’t know the answer and thought it was funny.
I taught long enough to know that only kids would dare to come up with answers like that.
they’re very funny, but I wouldn’t bet on them being authentic. still I’m grateful for the laugh, now I might not have to drink.
Oh just have a few sambucas anyway!
The Declaration of Independence is a hoot!
Amusing but even British children aren’t clever enough to think of most of these.
What is your best guess as to who answered these questions? Are you guessing some writer for a stand up comedian came up with the answers? I will admit, having been a former teacher (now retired) that they are very clever answers. However, over the years, I’ve had my fair share of witty kids in my elementary classes that could have felt bold enough to have come up with some of those answers once they reached high school. They were already busy sharpening their wit in my fourth and fifth grade classrooms. They showed no fear even then. AA
Thanks Mike, I’ll look into it when I return this afternoon. Don’t have time this morning. Voulunteer day. I guess this is why teachers drink! It didn’t show up this way in the email. AA
There’s something very strange going on with this post. I can see
“17) History
Question: What was introduced in the Children’s Charter of 1908?
Answer: Children”
… but after that, it all goes bad. There’s a light blue box with “After scouring exam papers ….” at the top, then about 23 “exams” without anything else. I’m looking with both IE and Firefox.
The html is very strange. Can you “View source” on that page, in your browser? Skip down to “whether to laugh” and look at the “src” URL for the images. Very strange – it looks like it’s going to a Windows Live ID page. The rest of the URL goes off somewhere else, with a long “GetAttachment” query with the name “GEORGE” in the last third.
AHA!!! I found the source:
Student howlers
(The UK Daily Mail is a sort of sober “National Enquirer”. They print gossip about “celebrities”, but also do a lot to expose Britain’s failing National Health System (one like our chaps are trying to get going here). One story in today’s paper has
“The full extent of the out-of-hours GP crisis emerged last night.
In some areas a single doctor is responsible for 300,000 people throughout the night. “)