Time to Accept

Gay woman wins Houston mayoral race

Opponent concedes; campaign marked by anti-homosexual rhetoric

Image: Annise Parker, Kathy Hubbard


David J. Phillip / AP

Houston Mayor-elect Annise Parker, center, celebrates with her partner Kathy Hubbard, left. Parker defeated former city attorney Gene Locke, making Houston the largest U.S. city to elect an openly gay mayor.


Parker’s sexual orientation became the focus of the race in recent weeks after anti-gay activists and conservative religious groups endorsed the 61-year-old Locke and sent out mailers condemning Parker’s “homosexual behavior.”

I’m probably sticking my neck way out today, but I can’t keep quiet about “conservative religious groups” and their stand on gays.

Perhaps I should preface this blog with the fact that I have never been nor never plan to be a lesbian. I’m not hard-wired that way. But I have had to lead my life very carefully because I’m a hetero.

Out of all the years of my life, I was married ten years of that life. The rest of the time I have been single. I grew up across the street from a girl I had known since first grade. When I started teaching, I needed a roommate to share an apartment. She asked if she could move in with me. As a result, we shared accommodations for five years. Neither of us could afford to live alone. I had no home to return to and she certainly was more than ready to move out of her parents’ home.

Because we were basically compatible as roommates, neither of us sought other arrangements until I became engaged to be married. We didn’t think anything about it. However, for whatever reason, because we had lived together for several years, a former friend started the rumor that we were gay. It was soon spread all over our small town. Why this “friend” thought she had to say something like that I never knew. We just ignored the rumors and eventually I guess they died down. At that time, had that rumor reached our employers, it may just have cost us our jobs. That was especially true for me since I was working with children.

Lillian Hellman wrote a smash Broadway play in the 1930’s called The Children’s Hour which dealt with the topic of lesbianism between two teachers. When it was made into a movie the first time around, the lesbian theme could not be used. It would not pass the censors. It had to be a love triangle called These Three. By 1961, the original theme was at least somewhat addressed once again in the remake release of The Children’s Hour. That movie came out only eight years before I started teaching. The town where I was teaching was bigger than the small village where we grew up, but it was small enough that if the administration had heard the rumor, it might have made a difference in my career.

The rest of my adult life after of my marriage, I have lived alone with my son until ten years ago when he graduated from college. I had plenty of room in my house for a roommate. If I had chosen a male roommate, there would have been rumors of a lover. If I had chosen a female roommate, there may have been rumors of a lesbian relationship. For twenty years of my life, until I retired from teaching, I chose for those reasons not to share my house. It was a lonely decision.

I live in one of the most conservative hotboxes in the U.S. Granted it is now a very large city and private lives are easier to conceal, but that was not always the case after my divorce. In addition, my son attended the same school where I taught, so I was in frequent contact on a social level with the parents of his friends.  I felt I could not afford rumors of either kind.

It has always confused me how “conservative religious groups” can express so much love for each other and yet be so completely intolerant of “others”. The word hypocritical comes to mind. Houston is not that far from here. You know if they can mount a major campaign to use hate to try to keep a lesbian woman out of office down there, there are as many “conservative religious groups” in all parts of Texas willing to fight the same battle.

I will never understand how so much intolerance and bigotry can exist in religious groups that call themselves Christian. It has only been twelve years since the torture and murder of Matthew Shepard and the picketing of his funeral by anti-gay Christian groups who held up signs saying “God Hates Fags” and “Matthew Shephard rots in hell”.

They always bring up Leviticus 18:22. They base their entire hate campaign on that. However, they choose to ignore all the other rules in Leviticus that they may be breaking on a daily basis.

I neither condone or condemn those who choose to live with same sex partners in a loving relationship. It is not my place to do so, as others seem to think it is their right and obligation. I have had a couple of readers suggest I study the Bible when I have written on other topics. They believe in the literal interpretation of this Holy Book. I choose to look at the Bible in a different light.

It is my prayer that what happens in a loving relationship between two adults will become an issue only between the two of them. It is my prayer that “conservative religious groups” will begin to pay more attention to the loving Christ in the New Testament and concern themselves more with their own lives than with the lives of others. I feel that too much belief of the message of the Bible is a pick and choose mentality. It will soon be the celebrated birth of Jesus for another year. It is time to love and accept each other as a whole regardless of race, ethnic group, religion, creed, political affiliation, or gender preference. That is what I pray so that headlines like the above will eventually disappear. It’s not like homosexuality will spread. It’s not catching. It’s about time that we accept that thought. If you don’t approve, then don’t seek out their company, but be aware, they are not as afraid to hide their sexual orientation as they once were. They are teachers, football players, ministers, priests, doctors, nurses, judges, TV stars, movie stars, politicians, you name it. They are out there. It’s about time to accept it or choose to live a hate-filled life that is hurting no one but the hater. Namaste. Attic Annie



Filed under Casual conversation, diary, general topics, life, musings, Uncategorized

4 responses to “Time to Accept

  1. freedomactionnow

    I’m more than willing to live and let live. The problem is, the homosexual movement is every bit as intolerant as the far-right Christian one.

    Gay-rights activists have harassed and gotten people fired because they supported California’s Prop 8.

    Maybe it’s time for both sides to back off and stop pushing each other’s agendas.

    I try to take each person as a unique individual, not a representative of some group.

    (Sometime it isn’t easy – whole-body tatoos and bits of metal poking out of skin is a definite “stay away” for me. But that’s another issue.)

    • atticannie

      Hi there. I completely agree. I don’t like extremists regardless of the cause. If we coud all just agree to meet in the middle but it is sadly, at least from my perspective, not the middle of the roaders like myself who ever manage to get things changed. If the MOTR people were the majority during the Revolutionary War, we’d probably never have gotten our independence. Body piercings and huge tatoos are not my cup of tea either. Aa


  2. I agree. There is too much judgement in the name of “religion.” The world might be a much better place if we all worked on bettering ourselves and made a bigger effort toward tolerance.

    • atticannie

      Hi Terri, You are the only one who has commented on this blog so far. I’m glad the first comment was a positive one. I’m waiting for some of my scripture quoting readers. Over the past four years, due to volunteer work, I have had the opportunity to meet many guys and straights who have AIDS. I have also met many that do not. I do occasional work with AIDS outreach programs. I have come to realize that each person I meet is fully human and deserves to be treated with the same respect as I show for anyone else. AA