MKSBTTAI Mantra…four days later


Meditation

Not OM but O M G!

Six days ago I told you my mantra is MKSBTTAI….maybe, kinda, sorta, beginning to think about it. I described my neighborhood and how hard it would be to leave it. Yesterday I signed papers putting the house on multiple listings. WHOA! My head is still spinning. I’m still on the maybe, kinda, sorta stage and my realtor is planning an open house! I had called her to ask for an estimate of what she thought the house was worth because I’m fighting my taxes and the next thing I know, we are looking for houses. Her name is Ingrid and, boy, does she know how to jump on opportunities.

As I was thoroughly cleaning this place in anticipation of the first couple looking at it before it was even listed, I realized how much I love this house. The unpleasant things that happened here are hazy memories. I thought about how beautiful my house looks when it is decorated for Christmas. I think about the feeling of tranquility in my blue living room being able to look out my big picture window at the distant crepe myrtles in the yard across the street. These are not his, but you get the idea.

crepe_myrtle_tree

 

I remember the fights my son and I had when he was so intent on being an alpha male when my ex left. His alpha maleness was a problem until he left his frosh year in high school for military school. Alpha male found bigger alpha males. He came back home a changed person. (It was his idea that he go.)

So many small things make me feel this is my HOME. I will have lived here 32 years by the middle of September. That’s a long time to grow roots! I’ve lived here  ten years longer than I did in my childhood home.

I told my realtor about the feeling of dragging my feet and how attached I really felt about this house. We both have similiar beliefs about the universe. She told me that when sellers are reluctant to sell, it takes longer to find a buyer. I have to release my house according to the laws of attraction. www.law-of-attraction-info.com 

(Please bear with my problems with my links until I find someone to help. Computer glitches are sooooo much fun.  My computer won’t let me hyperlink. )

I was instructed to take a deep breath and exhale. She then explained I should thank my house for providing me shelter all these years and tell my house to release me and let me move on to whatever destination the road might lead me. A new family will soon be entering to love it as much as I do. I am only a single person. Imagine the love a family with several children might have. OK they may all be monsters who yell and scream and mark on walls and throw temper tantrums. I think this house will be still be able to handle all that energy. Some times I think we age because of too little energy instead of too much. A family like that would energize this house again.

As much as I love this house, it will allow me to not have daily reminders of the tears and fears which accompanied the first five years of occupancy. There are so many sad memories during that time. When I hand over the keys, I will be leaving those memories behind and having an opportunity to create new ones.

I have looked at one home twice already. I am beginning to picture what it would be like to move in there. There are many possibilities to make it my home. I think I am going to downsize gradually. I’m going from a four bed down to a three bed. Maybe I’ll live there and move to an active retirement community in another twenty years to a one bedroom. I don’t plan to live until my bed is all I have in a nursing home. That’s downsizing too much!

 

nursing home

This is not my idea of final prime real estate! God bless this person.

If I move into that home I would be much closer to the duck pond where my dog and I sometimes walk when mornings are cooler. It’s on private property but I’ve been given permission to sit on the bench and watch the ducks. I especially love it when I get there just as the sun rises.

When we moved to this home there was a brand new McDonald’s built about a mile from this house. It was in the middle of NOWHERE! I mean open field south, west, and east of it for miles. I laughed at the thought that they wouldn’t be open for business very long. Within a matter of months, homes, and other businesses started popping up like mushrooms after a rain. Today I passed by that corner. All that was there was the golden arch on top the pole and a mountain  of rubbish waiting to be carted away. I thought, “That’s a sign of synchronicity.” We  arrived at the same time. Now that I no longer need this house, we are changing at the same time.” I don’t know if McD’s is just building a newer larger place or if something else will be going on that corner.

With all the activity in my life and a cranky computer, I may or may not be able to blog every day but I’ll try. Except for letting me hypertext, the good ol’ computer seems to be running. For those of you who might have started coming back on a regular basis, please keep checking back.

If it is cool, there’s always room on my porch until I sell…and my climate-controlled attic will never go away.

In the meantime, “Namaste” Attic Annie

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